1. At Lunch Time, Sit In Your Parked Car With Sunglasses on
And Point A Hair
Dryer At Passing Cars. See If They Slow Down.
2. Page Yourself Over The Intercom. Don't Disguise Your
Voice.
3. Every Time Someone Asks You To Do Something, Ask If They
Want Fries With
That.
4. Put Your Garbage Can On Your Desk And Label It
"In."
5. Put Decaf In The Coffee Maker For 3 Weeks. Once Everyone
Has Gotten Over
Their Caffeine Addictions, Switch To Espresso.
6. In The Memo Field Of All Your Checks, Write "For
Sexual Favors"
7. Finish All Your Sentences With "In Accordance With
The Prophecy."
8. Don't Use Any Punctuation
9. As Often As Possible, Skip Rather Than Walk.
10. Ask People What Sex They Are. Laugh Hysterically After
They Answer.
11. Specify That Your Drive-through Order Is "To
Go."
12. Sing Along At The Opera.
13. Go To A Poetry Recital And Ask Why The Poems Don't Rhyme
14. Put Mosquito Netting Around Your Work Area And Play
Tropical Sounds All
Day.
15. Five Days In Advance, Tell Your Friends You Can't Attend
Their Party
Because You're Not In The Mood.
16. Have Your Coworkers Address You By Your Wrestling Name,
Rock Hard.
17. When The Money Comes Out The ATM, Scream "I Won!, I
Won!"
18. When Leaving The Zoo, Start Running Towards The Parking
Lot, Yelling
"Run For Your Lives, They're Loose!!"
19. Tell Your Children Over Dinner. "Due To The
Economy, We Are Going To
Have To Let One Of You Go."
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